Your poor wisdom teeth (let alone you), Frances. Maybe they were telling you something (and I don't mean that in a judgemental way). From your later journey into Chinese Bare Foot Medicine I am thinking that your pulses were well out of whack at that time. Also I can't help thinking that Tony must have felt extremely inadequate compared to you.
Dan has often said that most people who know me would say that I made them feel inadequate. I was shocked when he first said it but can see that he might be right.
I so look forward to reading these memory lane blogs Frances. What a life....and it's just the beginning. Glad you've pulled through so many sticky situations. Thank you for writing about them.
I am very glad you like them, 'sticky' though they certainly were! I get flashbacks of other events from around that time but I am not sure of their context or where they fit in the timeline. I remember my grandparents turning up unexpectedly and buying me a new pair of jeans with a matching waistcoat that I later wore for many, many years (for example).... so I had happy moments too, among all the chaos! Memory is a funny thing, sometimes it only registers brief snatches and other times every detail is in horrific technicolour. I will never forget, for example, being soaked in Jai's blood. He was protecting me from that guy and paid for it.
I agree how memory is a funny thing. I've noticed for myself how pieces pop into awareness from decades prior due to a mere seemingly tiny similarity to something currently happening and I hadn't thought of that memory in ages.....Many times now it is with a huge sense of gratitude for the experience or a different perspective of it. Noticing now how I may treasure it more than I ever thought I would, or appreciating a lesson I now can grasp from the recall of it., paired with the wisdom of aging. How rich life is. Also, sometimes a recollection comes with a shudder....glad the situation is over. Thanks again Frances for sharing your richness of memories.
It is difficult to remember all the details now. I was still foggy from glandular fever I suppose. There must have been a lot more going on but I only remember the end of 1976 as a series of shocks and dramas. I remember trying to get my dog, Dylan back but I was being fobbed off with fake sympathy. Dylan didn't need a lot of care, he usually went out and about on his own anyway. I vaguely remember going to the garage where Tony's brother worked and was horrified that Dylan was tied up, at the front of the building, on a long chain. I said I wanted to take him home but Pete kept up the pretence that it was only temporary and Dylan would come home when he found and trained a good guard dog. That never happened. Then the excuse was "Well, he is settled here now!" - who does things like that?
My life was being run by Tony and I felt as if I was tied up on a long chain like Dylan. No wonder my memory of that time is so sketchy.
You know they say that cannabis smokers lose their memory? Well, I have smoked cannabis since I was 24 with occasional breaks. My memory is very sharp in spite of it.
What jumps out to me is how you open w what seemed like a fairytale wedding. You were very young and but for the grace of God there I was, I thought, young and in love twice, what would have it turned out to be if I married either one? As we get older, at least for me, as we know ppl over many yrs and see what and how they grow into can be shocking, not at all who you thought that person to be. My late husband, same thing. It makes me question myself and how I did not see the character flaws. So Tony had to grow into what he had become. They hide it so well. I feel very sad about Dylan. I've been there. What a special boy.
PREVIOUS EPISODES are listed in the pinned comment here - https://francesleader.substack.com/p/sunday-in-memory-lane-episode-13
Your poor wisdom teeth (let alone you), Frances. Maybe they were telling you something (and I don't mean that in a judgemental way). From your later journey into Chinese Bare Foot Medicine I am thinking that your pulses were well out of whack at that time. Also I can't help thinking that Tony must have felt extremely inadequate compared to you.
Dan has often said that most people who know me would say that I made them feel inadequate. I was shocked when he first said it but can see that he might be right.
love it, as always :)
xoxo
Good Lord, Frances! You were only twenty-four when all of this was happening? I think I held my breath reading this one... xo
Yeah, 24, going on 54! 🙄 Methuselah has nuffin on me, I am 100 now! 🤣
I so look forward to reading these memory lane blogs Frances. What a life....and it's just the beginning. Glad you've pulled through so many sticky situations. Thank you for writing about them.
I am very glad you like them, 'sticky' though they certainly were! I get flashbacks of other events from around that time but I am not sure of their context or where they fit in the timeline. I remember my grandparents turning up unexpectedly and buying me a new pair of jeans with a matching waistcoat that I later wore for many, many years (for example).... so I had happy moments too, among all the chaos! Memory is a funny thing, sometimes it only registers brief snatches and other times every detail is in horrific technicolour. I will never forget, for example, being soaked in Jai's blood. He was protecting me from that guy and paid for it.
I agree how memory is a funny thing. I've noticed for myself how pieces pop into awareness from decades prior due to a mere seemingly tiny similarity to something currently happening and I hadn't thought of that memory in ages.....Many times now it is with a huge sense of gratitude for the experience or a different perspective of it. Noticing now how I may treasure it more than I ever thought I would, or appreciating a lesson I now can grasp from the recall of it., paired with the wisdom of aging. How rich life is. Also, sometimes a recollection comes with a shudder....glad the situation is over. Thanks again Frances for sharing your richness of memories.
Quite a story! Wow.
It is difficult to remember all the details now. I was still foggy from glandular fever I suppose. There must have been a lot more going on but I only remember the end of 1976 as a series of shocks and dramas. I remember trying to get my dog, Dylan back but I was being fobbed off with fake sympathy. Dylan didn't need a lot of care, he usually went out and about on his own anyway. I vaguely remember going to the garage where Tony's brother worked and was horrified that Dylan was tied up, at the front of the building, on a long chain. I said I wanted to take him home but Pete kept up the pretence that it was only temporary and Dylan would come home when he found and trained a good guard dog. That never happened. Then the excuse was "Well, he is settled here now!" - who does things like that?
My life was being run by Tony and I felt as if I was tied up on a long chain like Dylan. No wonder my memory of that time is so sketchy.
Damn, that sucks. Glad it's behind you!
your memory is far better than mine, i often wonder when reading these how i cant remember a 10th of what you do
You know they say that cannabis smokers lose their memory? Well, I have smoked cannabis since I was 24 with occasional breaks. My memory is very sharp in spite of it.
What jumps out to me is how you open w what seemed like a fairytale wedding. You were very young and but for the grace of God there I was, I thought, young and in love twice, what would have it turned out to be if I married either one? As we get older, at least for me, as we know ppl over many yrs and see what and how they grow into can be shocking, not at all who you thought that person to be. My late husband, same thing. It makes me question myself and how I did not see the character flaws. So Tony had to grow into what he had become. They hide it so well. I feel very sad about Dylan. I've been there. What a special boy.
I expect that. Nobody knew what to say at the time either. xx